LOST Alert! Because I love you!

Posted on May 30th, 2008 by admin

My hunny is in Nigeria, Africa for work. Unfortunately he is not able to watch regular television, although he did say that he caught an episode of American Choppers, gross. And the Internet at his place is slower than snot. That means that he may not be able to watch LOST for some time. And not watching LOST is just awful, torture. I feel for him. Last night wasn’t just any LOST episode. It was the season finale! Two hours of action packed, shocking, awesomeness. For those of you who don’t watch LOST you probably won’t want to read this post as it will mean nothing to you. You also need to get with the program and rent the first season of LOST on DVD. Everyone’s doin’ it. Yes the show is crazy and complicated…but it’s just that good. I know you’ll like it. Unless your Amanda (T’s sis). She doesn’t like to watch things that make her think or require her to use her brain in any way.

Since I love my T dearly, I thought that I would give him (and the world) a play by play of the season finale. You’re welcome T. You’re welcome.

****WARNING: LOST spoiler alert! If you haven’t seen the finale-don’t read this. Unless you’re like T, who feels the need to ruin the moment of surprise by reading every spoiler he can on the Internet. Stop reading now unless you want to spoil all the fun. And don’t be mad at me…I warned you.

*Please note that the following notes are poorly written, grossly misspelled, and grammatically disgusting! They are notes after all.*

Ready….?

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Jack and Kate contine their convo at the airport when Jack was all drunk. Jack says that he went to Jeremy Benthams funeral.

On island: Bad dudes have Ben hostage, are taking him to the helicopter. In runs Kate, says shes being chased by Bens ppl. The others kill all the bad dudes and the ageless guy kills the last bad dude, Patches Jr. Kate and Ben run. Meet up with the others and Ben says that Kate and Sayid can take the chopper off the island.

Micheal, Jin, Desmond are on ship trying to disable the C4.

Walt and his grandma visit Hurley in the psycho ward. Says that Jeremy Bentham was the only one that came to visit after they returned.

Island: Lock says that Jack knows that he was meant to be on the island. Doesn’t want him to go. Jack says he’s going. Locke says that when he gets back he has to lie to protect the miracle island. Ben and Lock go down into the Orchid.

Back on ship: Micheal says hes going to freeze the C4 with Nitrogen. Blah Blah.

Scientist dude Daniel is still running people back to the ship from the island. Comes back for another group.

Miles and Dan and that girl Charlotte. Dan says they need to be on that next raft! Miles says hes gonna stay. Miles is surprised girl wants to leave, surprised after all that time she spent trying to get back to the island. ??

Orchid: Lock and Ben going down into the elevator. Ben gives Locke a video to watch to answer some questions. Ben starts putting stuff into this portal thingy. Weird asian dude, orientation for station 6.

Kate undoes the handcuffed pilot dude. Sayid, Locke, Sawyer, and Hurley all meet up at the chopper. Kate, Sawyer, Locke, Sayid, Hurley all get on the chopper. They head to the ship.

Orchid: Somehow the Lil Patches guy shows up even though he got shot. He’s got a knife and is lookin for Ben. He had body armor on, duh. He’s creepy as hell. He shows a heart rate monitor strapped to his arm. “Dead Mans trigger”. When he dies, it will blow the C4 on the ship. Lock and Ben attack him. Ben stabs him in the neck a bunch, cuz of his daughter getting killed by him. His monitor starts going crazy. Lock says, “You just killed all the peeps on the ship.” Ben says, “So”. Ass.

Island: Charlotte wants to stay on the island. She said shes looking for where she was born. They say goodbye to each other. Dan takes a boat full of random extras back the ship. Juliette stays behind.

Ship: Des, Micheal, and Jin still trying to undo the C4. Don’t have much of the freezy stuff left. May need to evacuate the boat. The ones in the chopper are suddenly losing a crap ton of fuel! Oh no! There’s a bullet hole in the tank. Jack says to keep going towards the boat. Have to get rid of the extra weight now! They throw crap out the chopper. Don’t see the boat yet. Sawyer whispers something in Kate’s ear and then kisses her like a porn star. I think he’s gonna jump out. He does! It’s a long way down to the water, he comes up thank god. Chopper moves on. He starts to swim. Kate cries.

Shows Sayid shooting some dude in a car that was at the Santa Rosa mental institute. He goes inside. Finds Hurley. Wants H to come with him somewhere safe. Says: Bentham is dead. Who the F is Bentham? Hurley says, why do you call him Bentham his name is……? Sayid says they are being watched and he killed a spy outside. Hurley agrees to go with Sayid. Hurley was playing chess with…Mr. Echo who really isn’t there.

Chopper: Still don’t see the ship. They see the boat in the distance.

Orchid: Lil Patches is dieing. Ben won’t help Lock save him. Dude says, that Windmore will find Ben. Ben says, Not if I find him first. LP dies. Monitor beeps.

Ship: Red light on C4 comes on. Don’t know how much time they have before the stuff blows. Des runs upstairs and gets life jackets. Doesn’t want the chopper to land. Des is yelling BOMB. “Don’t land!” Des says they have to get off. They start fixing the holes in tank and putting gas in it. Michael tells Jin to leave and get his wife off the ship before it blows. Everyone is getting on the chopper. Jin is running towards it but they end up leaving without him. Oh no! Sun is yelling to go back. Michael is with the C4, hears whispers. Then Jacks dad pops up (creepy!) and says, “You can go now Michael.” Then ship BLOWS up. Sun starts screaming for Jin from the chopper! L

Commercial for LOST: 3 different endings will be shown tomorrow. WTF??

Chopper: Says that they need to go back for Jin! Jack says….”He’s gone!” Baby Erin is crying. Ship is totally destroyed. Jack says get to the Island.

Shows Sun in London. Talking to her Mom and kid on the phone. Sees Windmore. Says shes the manager of Peck industries. “Are you going to pretend you don’t know who I am.” Awkward. She gives him her business card so they can talk. He says to her, “Why would you want to help me?” She said that they have common interests.

Orchid: Lock is freaking cuz LP is dead. They turn on the portal thing and it blows up. It blows up bc Ben put a bunch of metal crap inside. The video said not to do that.

Island: Juliette sees Sawyer swim to shore. He’s shirtless in case you were wondering. They look out to the island and see the smoke from the ship.

Orchid: Ben is getting a warm jacket because he’s going somewhere cold. Lock can’t go with Ben. Jacob wants Ben to go because who ever moves the island can’t come back. Ben says that he has to go lead the Others. They say goodbye to each other with a handshake. Ben gets in the portal thingy with a crow bar.

Lock leaves and goes to the Others’ camp site. Ageless guy says Hello John, Welcome Home. John smiles.

Ben crawls out through where the portal thingy blasted. He’s going towards a weird and breaks through a sheet of ice? and falls out into this like arctic dungeon. There’s a big wheel that he turns and says I hope you’re happy now Jacob. There’s this weird noise on the island. Everyone’s looking around. Bens still turning the wheel. It’s getting really bright! Island lights up! Loud, ear piercing noise. And this like kerplunk into the ocean where the Island used to be. Uh oh.

Chopper: No where to land! They are out of fuel. They put life jackets on cuz they are gonna crash. “Brace yourselves,” says the pilot!!!! They crash into the water!

Preview for that new show Wipeout. Kinda like MXC only they probably don’t die. Looks really funny. I’m gonna watch it fo sho.

Ok, they are all in the water after the crash. They are all Ok, considering they just crashed again. Des is face down in the water. Live Des!!!!! They are all piling onto a piece of the chopper that’s floating. Des has a cut on his head. Jack does CPR on him. He coughs up water. Yeah!! Poor Sun is in like total shock and is holding Erin.

Shows Kate in a bed. Phone rings. It’s weird clicks and a voice. Someone is in her apartment. She gets a gun out of a box in her closet. There is someone in Erin’s room. It’s Claire!!!!!!!! She says, “Don’t bring him back Kate.” Then she wakes up, it was a dream. She checks on Erin, he’s fine.

In the water: It’s dark and they are still floating. Hurley can’t believe that Lock was able to move the island. Jack says, “No he didn’t.” Doubting. They see a boat off in the distance. Jack looks worried. Say’s that they are gonna have to lie about everything that’s happened on the island. Jack says to let him do the talking. It’s Penny on the boat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Des is freakin’ to see her. The boat was called the Searcher. Aww…they hug and kiss. She says she found him from his phone call. She tracked it. Des says he will never leave Penny again. They all get on the boat. Des introduces everyone to Penny. Jack says, “We’ve gotta talk.”

Penny’s Boat: They get into this little boat and Jack says Ok, let’s go home. I guess they are rowing to a near by island. Des stays with Penny. They get to an island and all these little islanders meet them. Sayid says they have to do this cuz it’s the only way to keep them safe. ?

Shows Jack all drunk in his Bronco again. He’s at a funeral parlor. It’s night time. He can’t get in. He breaks the door with a rock like a drunk punk. He goes in to see a casket. I think it’s the same from a while ago. Creepy music. The paper says Jeremy Bentham. He opens it. Ben comes in behind him and freaks Jack out. “Did he tell you that I was off the Island?” Jeremy had came to see everyone. Jeremy had told Jack that after he left the Island bad stuff happened because of him and that he needed to come back. Who is Jeremy?? Ben says the island won’t let you come alone. All of you have to go back. Jack says he can’t get everyone together. Ben says he can help. They have to do it together. Ben says he has a few ideas. Ben says they have to bring the dead dude, Jeremy too. Dead dude is……………………………..LOCK! Lock was in the casket! OMG.

The end.

Holy crap I love this show. And the hot bodies like this one…

*I know this isn’t a LOST shot, but dang!

Ok…so it wasn’t a interesting or nearly as suspenseful as the actual show…but you get the point.

I hope, if you read this, that you were able to comprehend my notes. Yes, it’s grammatically incorrect and misspelled, but I must say that I’m pretty darn good at taking notes.

Goodbye LOST….until we meet again next season.

I love you and want to apologize (again) for shunning you for the first three seasons of your life. I had no idea what I was missing.

Happy FRIDAY!!!!!!!!